When Angela Harders responded to a prompt on TikTok, claiming that a pregnancy resource center (PRC) changed her life after just one phone call, she likely didn’t expect that video to make such an impact. But it did.
The prompt asked, “What’s one small unimportant decision that you made that changed the whole trajectory of your life?” In her video, which quickly went viral, Harders explained, “I decided to call a random pregnancy center a couple states away… and the lady who answered the phone changed my whole life. And the funny thing is – I don’t even know her name.”
Harders said she had been raped, and became pregnant. Having grown up in a “devout Christian family,” she said she was raised to value all human life — but she said it was also during a period that was “extremely centered on purity culture.” The pastor of her church was Joshua Harris, of “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” fame, and her father was vice president of a PRC.
“I had promised that I was going to save my first kiss for my wedding day,” she said. “You can imagine my horror when I, the girl who had never dated before, the good Christian girl, found myself pregnant. And even though I was pro-life, my gut reaction was to schedule an appointment at Planned Parenthood for that Friday afternoon.”
@peacefulworldschooler #stitch with @Amy Elizabeth one phone call that changed the rest of my life… #life #christianmom #christian #christianity #prolife #chooselife #momsoftiktok ♬ original sound – Angela Harders, M.Ed
But something told Harders to reach out for help; so, scared of being recognized anywhere near her, she called a random PRC located several states away.
“When the lady answered the phone, I couldn’t even speak. She let me cry, and she just said, ‘Oh, honey, I’m here with you on the phone whenever you’re ready,'” Harders recalled. “When I was finally able to collect myself enough to speak, I shared with her about what happened, and her response just blew me away. She said to me, ‘Sex doesn’t make babies, God does.'”
She then assured Harders that this baby had been given to her for a purpose. “For some reason, God is choosing to give you a life out of this terrible circumstance,” she said the woman told her. “Immediately, this overwhelming sense of peace came over me, and I knew that she was right. For some reason, God was choosing to give me a baby, to give me a life out of this situation that I thought was going to be the death of me.”
Survivors of rape are often told that having an abortion will make their pain and trauma go away, while having a baby will make it worse. However, abortion often only serves as a barrier to healing.
Rape survivor Liana Rebolledo, who was assaulted at age 12 and became pregnant, said in a recent interview with Live Action founder and president Lila Rose, “I don’t forget, but I forgive,” referring to her assailants, who were never brought to justice. “Abortion is not a solution when you’re raped.”
She added, “[Abortion] doesn’t help you. It’s just a double rape. That’s the way I thought about it, that it was going to be a double rape. And if I did that, I don’t think I would be alive today.”
After speaking to the woman at the PRC, Harders canceled her appointment with Planned Parenthood, though the response she got surprised her.
“[The Planned Parenthood staffer] knew that I was a Christian, because that was something that I shared with her when I booked the appointment in the first place,” Harders said. “She said, ‘Angela, you know that if you go through with [the pregnancy], you will never be able to travel again, or be a missionary, or do any of those other things that you said you wanted to do. We can take care of this problem for you so you can live your life and fulfill all the dreams that God has given you.'” (emphasis added)
Trying to exploit Harders’ faith to push her into having an abortion backfired; it only made Harders more resistant to the notion of getting an abortion.
“The difference between the two calls, for me, was so staggering,” she said. “With the first call that I had, I hung up the phone feeling hopeful, and empowered. Of course I was still nervous and afraid, but overall, I had this overwhelming sense of peace, like – I can do this! But my call to Planned Parenthood was so different. When I hung up the phone with Planned Parenthood, I felt like this baby was a problem to get rid of, not a life to be cherished or enjoyed.”
She said because she canceled that appointment, she now is the mother to a beautiful little girl — and is accomplishing her dreams, too.
“Not only am I still able to travel the world and do all the things that the lady at Planned Parenthood said I would never be able to do — now I get to do it with the most incredible human being that I’ve ever known,” she said, adding, “My daughter is no problem. She is the greatest joy of my life, and I will forever be grateful to the stranger on the other end of the line from a random pregnancy center in New York, who told me I could do it.”
