As a Jewish girl growing up in Iowa, Jane “Goldie” Winn lived a sheltered life. Her father, who was a prominent psychiatrist, wouldn’t permit her to date. By the time she entered college to study music therapy, she had no experiences with men. But when she joined a hippie commune in Michigan, the young woman would soon find herself traveling across the country to abort her baby.
Winn told Live Action News, “I’d always felt awkward but then I found the commune which was accepting of a girl like me. I felt I had found my people. There, engaging in multiple casual sexual liaisons as was expected and accepted.”
She didn’t concern herself with the consequences of a promiscuous lifestyle until one day when someone asked if she if had her menstrual period recently.
“It was suggested I go to the school nurse and get checked out,” Winn said. “I hadn’t thought about doing so, but I went because although I had no pregnancy symptoms, I hadn’t had a period in some time.”
The pregnancy test came back positive. Now, Winn was in a dilemma. She couldn’t tell her parents – her father was a high-profile community member and would be deeply embarrassed.
Winn said, “My friend at the commune suggested I end the pregnancy. This was before Roe made abortion legal [throughout the nation], so it was suggested I go to California to obtain the abortion. All my friends chipped in to send me to San Jose where there was a hotel for unmarried, pregnant women seeking abortions.”
But Winn soon discovered that abortions were considered shameful, even in California.
“When the hotel proprietor checked me in, he told me to never come back there again,” Winn said.
The root cause of her mysterious pain
Undergoing the required examination prior to the abortion, Winn was surprised to discover she was well into her second trimester of pregnancy. “This was before ultrasounds were available,” Winn said. “Because I was so far along, I was told I’d have to have a saline abortion at a hospital in San Francisco.”
As Winn entered the hospital’s ward where the abortions were performed, she was unnerved to hear women crying and someone screaming, ‘Give me my baby back!”
After administering the saline, a nurse told her to press the button once she felt the baby stop moving.
“When my baby was being delivered, I heard a big plop in the pan,” Winn said. “The nurse made a point of telling me that I would have had a perfectly formed baby boy. I felt ashamed.”
In the aftermath of her abortion, Winn experienced numbness, shock, and nightmares. She turned to drugs and sexual promiscuity to deaden the horrific memories that haunted her. Soon, however, her body was wracked with pain.
Winn said, “I didn’t know what the pain was the result of. I went to the school nurse but was refused an examination unless my parents consented. Another fallout from having the abortion.”
Returning to school after her abortion, Winn was unable to concentrate on anything, including playing saxophone in her band. She ended up failing classes in school. Still grappling with the mysterious pain, she called her sister, who contacted the hospital — but she was again refused an examination because of her illegal abortion.
READ: Live Action’s new campaign, ‘Can’t Stay Silent,’ shines a light on abortion’s harm to women and men
“I had no choice but to call my parents,” Winn said. “The first thing my dad said to me when I told him everything that had happened, was that I might as well kill myself, because I was no good to the family.”
He called back moments later and told her he loved her and that he was going to get her an appointment with a psychiatrist so she could get well.
Winn said, “The moment he told me he loved me, the pain immediately left my body. That’s what I had been needing to hear.”
At her initial session with the psychiatrist, her mother was present. “She would shame me, and I felt so much guilt,” Winn said. “Then, my psychiatrist asked her to leave the room and told me I needed to get away from my parents for a while. I went to live with relatives and underwent two years of intensive psychotherapy.”
Salvation in Christ opened doors to share her story
For most of Winn’s life, God seemed so big and so far away. In 1974, she attended a Catholic prayer meeting and came to know Jesus. When she understood how much God loved her, it was a turning point.
She got her master’s degree in social work and established a private practice at a Christian counseling agency. There, she counseled a young Christian woman who faced an unplanned pregnancy and had decided to have an abortion — but miscarried while at the clinic. The young woman was suffering from guilt around her intent to abort. Winn took her to the pregnancy support center to get additional help.
Winn said, “That’s where I was approached to apply for the Client Services Director position. With my husband’s encouragement, I interviewed for the position. I spilled out my entire past spanning 27 years, and despite that, was hired.”
First, she needed to complete post-abortive counseling and enrolled in a “Forgiven and Set Free” Bible study.
“When I said out loud that I had murdered my baby, I fell to the floor and cried,” Winn said. “All the traumatic memories came rushing back.”
She named her baby Samuel, as required by Jewish tradition to name the first son using the first initial of her father’s name. Although Winn and her husband did not have children together, he told her he wanted to adopt her baby in Heaven.
Winn said, “Since then, we’ve been blessed with many spiritual children.”
For the past 37 years, Winn has been working in pregnancy ministry in various roles. She uses her story to help women change their minds about abortion. She wrote “Rainbow in the Night,” a book that took 20 years to complete and has been adapted into a movie. “I had to work through so many issues, but the book was finally published in 2019 and is sold on Amazon,” Winn said.
She feels God has given her a broader vision, using her story to open women’s hearts to the Lord.
Winn said, “God gets all the glory. He brought the right people into my life to help me produce and distribute the movie to reach non-believers and those who are pro-choice. I want to bring hope and salvation to others and want women to know that God can use your abortion for His greatest purposes.”
Tell President Trump, RFK, Jr., Elon, and Vivek:
Stop killing America’s future. Defund Planned Parenthood NOW!
