Despite claiming that she never wanted to have children, one woman has gone public with her decision to instead donate eggs to help infertile couples have families. This, of course, means that she will end up a biological parent to dozens of children, albeit children who may spend their lives robbed of knowing their biological mother.
Yahoo! Life UK profiled a woman named Alex Webster, who began donating her eggs in 2020. She’s since donated 88 eggs, which have been used by four families so far. “I’m possibly not geared for motherhood as much as some,” she said. “Because there are women who need help creating their own families, this is where I can fit in. It seemed like a waste to me that I have these eggs while there are lots of women who want to start families but can’t. I can help them and I want to be able to help them if that means they can start the family they want.”
Webster described the process of getting ready for egg retrieval as “intense,” explaining that it left her feeling “wiped out” for days afterward. Women are frequently led to believe that egg donation is safe and low-risk, but there are, in fact, substantial risks involved. One of the most dangerous side effects is ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome (OHSS). OHSS is a response to the excess hormones women are administered during the process, which cause the ovaries to swell and become painful. In severe cases, this can be life-threatening, yet women are assured that there is only a 1% risk of getting OHSS when donating eggs.
Wendy Kramer, director and co-founder of the Donor Sibling Registry, disagrees. “[O]ur research paints a different picture. In our first published study of 155 egg donors, we found that 30.3% reported Ovarian Hyper Stimulation Syndrome (OHSS),” she previously wrote. “In our second survey of 176 egg donors in 2014, we found that 32.4% of egg donors reported complications such as OHSS and infection. In our third Study of 363 egg donors in 2021, 22.4% reported experiencing OHSS.”
Time Magazine also reported that there have been no studies done on the long-term effects of egg donation.
For now, Webster said the families who have used her eggs remain anonymous — but that could change in the future. “I don’t have the option to know the families I am helping,” she said. “Once the children reach 16 they will be allowed to get a little bit of information and then when they reach 18 they are allowed to get identifying information. There is the potential that they will be able to get in contact with me.”
And whether Webster wants to acknowledge it or not, she is a mother — despite claiming she doesn’t want to have children. She could potentially have up to 88 children if all of her eggs are successfully used. Though many in the fertility industry like to pretend everything about creating children is positive, the children in question often grow up to feel differently. One Harvard Medical School study found that 62% of children conceived through donor technologies believe it to be unethical and immoral. This isn’t altogether surprising, considering these children were intentionally deprived of at least one of their biological parents, as well as the knowledge of their biological background and heritage.
“When you are commissioning and swiping your credit card for a product, even one that you want badly, you are participating in commodification, regardless of whether the intended parents are the biological parents of the surrogate-born children,” Katie Breckenridge, of the children’s rights advocacy organization Them Before Us, has explained. “In this case, the products are human beings.”
